23. Sid’s Snake


Sid was depressed.
His dick had had a little stroke.
No, he hadn’t been yanked off by Ronnie Corbett.
His cock had suffered a spaz attack.
It had forgotten how to piss.
It had forgotten how to get hard.
It had forgotten how to cum.
Sid is a randy kind of bloke, and he didn’t take the news very well. Despite being in his fifties, he still had a very a active sex life, so he was in a bit of a quandary.
He also had to piss through a pipe.
I saw him in the canteen, looking rather glum.
‘How’s the cock, Sid?’
Not good, Lucifer, not good.”
“Still not managed it yet?”
“No, and God knows I’ve tried. I’ve been to the doctor’s again.”
“What did he say?”
“He reckoned that everything was still the same. No better, no worse. I told him that I’d seen something on the internet that might help. I’m thinking that if I can cum just once, then it might kick it all into action, if you see what I mean?”
I didn’t really want to ask, because he looks at some odd stuff on the net, does Sid.
“What did you see on the internet, Sid?”
It had to be done.
“Prostate massage, Lucifer. Know anything about it?”
“No. No, I don’t.”
“Well, apparently blokes have this doughnut shaped thing up their arses…”
Oh no.
“and if you kind of poke it the right way, it can make you cum.”
“That’s great Sid. I’ve actually popped in for a sandwich so..”
Well I mentioned this to the doc, and he seemed a bit uncomfortable, but said it was true. Well, I asked him if it would work for me, and he said he wasn’t sure, so I asked if it was worth a try, and he said he supposed so.”
“And?”
“And I asked him to do it to me, to see if it worked.”
“You asked a doctor to arse-poke you with his finger until you shot your load.”
“Well, yes.”
“And he’s a bloke?’
“Yes.”
“And you didn’t see a problem with that?”
“Not really. He’s a professional, isn’t he?”
“He’s a professional doctor, Sid. Not a professional arse poker.”
“Hmmm…”
“He said no, didn’t he?”
“Yes, he did.”
“I’m off. Good luck with your cock, Sid.”
“Not having a sandwich, Lucifer?”
“No, I’m not.”

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